Six Degrees of Separation

"First, you think the worst is a broken heart
What's gonna kill you is the second part
And the third, Is when your world splits down the middle
And fourth, you're gonna think that you fixed yourself
Fifth, you see them out with someone else
And the sixth, is when you admit that you may have f%&*ed up a little." - The Script

 Listen to the song here! 

Whilst these lyrics are written specifically for people who have had a bad breakup with a boyfriend or girlfriend, I feel it is rather relevant for any relationship.

So often, we begin new relationships and end others. It is always exciting to begin new connections yet it is so difficult to end ones that once meant so much.
When I heard this, I really connected with it because it is true that there are stages of grief we all go through.

The broken heart is always the first. That moment when you physically feel as if your heart has torn apart. It almost feels as if all functioning ceases to exist.
The second part that is not mentioned, for me, is the coming to terms with the loss.
The third is when your world splits down the middle because everything associated with that person changes. All their friends or all the memories they shared with you shatter.
Then you eventually get to a point where you genuinely believe you have moved on until you see them with other people. It is a mortifying feeling knowing that someone has moved on and you haven't.
Lastly, you start to blame yourself. You start over analyzing the situation and looking at all the different things you could have done.

The truth is, if you haven't come across an end to a relationship you probably will. I know this sounds depressing but it is important to know that you are not the only one.

We all are constantly changing an growing as life carries on and so are other people. Sometimes, there comes a time where 2 people who were once so in sync, soulmates, change. Their paths split. This happens all the time and it is truly heartbreaking especially to those important close relationships. But is this a reason to say "you may have f%&*ed up a little"?. No, it is not your fault you changed and it is not your fault someone else changed. Life happens to each  and everyone of us.

So then we get to something called 'moving on'. If you had to sit and define what you think it is, do you think it is the same for everyone else? I used to be one of those people that 'buries things under the carpet' instead of dealing with it. And so the issue would keep occurring until I dealt with it.I've learned that it is easier to deal with something with maturity and time instead of burying it just so I can feel numb. Obviously this is not how everyone should 'move on', sometimes burying it works for people sometimes it doesn't. The key thing here is to figure out what the best way is for you to move on.

Here is an interesting quote, I stumbled upon.
When we lose relationships that mean so much, people who say "time heals all wounds" are annoying.
That is not what we want to hear. But I think it is true in  the sense that in time, it gets less painful and you think about it less. When I read this quote, it was exactly how I felt with the original quote. It is in fact that time does not heal the wound because it is always going to be there. Eventually, we try to move on by sewing up our broken heart so  that the pain is less. But it is never really gone. That person will always be in our hearts. What matters is that we are able to come to our senses and let the scar tissue decrease the pain so that we can move on to relationships that meant for that moment in time. Everything happens for a reason (I believe) and by moving on and closing one door, we are able to open many others which will bring joy and happiness and light.

Which ever stage you might find yourself in at one time or another, know two things;
You are not alone & when you figure out hot to move on, things will get better... way better!

~ S

Leave a comment if you like :)
@HerQuoteBook (Twitter)

xoxo

Believe In Your Dreams

"Take a look at yourself in a mirror,
who do you see looking back?
Is it the person you want to be?
Or is there someone else you were meant to be,
the person you should have been but fell short of?
Is someone telling you 'can't' or 'won't'?
Because you can.
Believe that love is out there.
Believe that dreams come true everyday.
Because they do.
Sometimes happiness doesn't come from money, fame or power.
Sometimes happiness comes from good friends and family
And from the quiet nobility of leading a good life.
Believe that dreams come true everyday,
Because they do.
So take a look at the mirror and remind yourself to be happy
Because you deserve to be.
Believe that.
And believe that dreams come true everyday, because they do"
- Quote from "One Tree Hill"

This is one of my favourite quotes to read when I'm feeling down or close to giving up on something because I don't believe in myself. This quote shows me that I should believe in myself because dreams do become reality.

I have been thinking about what to write for a while now. Suddenly I realised "wait a moment, my dreams came true". Like most people reading this pose, I am very into my music, specifically those songs that tell a story. You know, the songs that have depth and soul within the lyrics. So like most people, I have a favourite band and it's the type of thing where you know all the songs and all the lyrics. It is not a very well known band, but it just so happens that they had a tour in my country and i was fortunate enough to see them. Not only that, but I was fortunate enough to meet them as well as speak and have a photo with them. To most people, this may seem like quite a weird situation to equate as a dream. But to be able to see this band play live and feel the soul in their music reminded me just how much I miss music. Just how much I miss playing the piano and guitar and writing songs. It reminded me how wrapped up I was in my goal to advance in my career that I had forgotten the very essence of what I truly love. Not only did I realise how much I missed music, I realised how lucky I was to be someone who managed to meet their favourite band. This doesn't happen very often. It felt as if the universe had aligned everything to occur for it happen.

The point of this post is not to tell you about my experience. The point is to show you that maybe your band is something else and that the universe is getting ready to align everything in order for you to confront your dream. It is about realising what your dream is and to pursue it. It is important to shed all those around you that underestimate your ability to succeed at whatever you wish to succeed at. Sometimes being alone means that you need to work on yourself before you cross paths with 'the one'. Don't stop believing that someone is out there for you because they are. Don't stop believing in your dreams because you can do whatever you put your mind to. Dont stop believing in yourself, because you deserve to be happy and you deserve for your dreams to come true. I hope that after reading this, you feel inspired and ready to conquer whatever challenge may face you. The world will stand aside for a person who knows where they are going.

The Script
The band I was fortunate enough to see live and meet.